My Damn Dog

Waiting for Guffman

joanna — Sun, 03 Jul 2005 16:47:20 +0000

I feel like Corky St. Clair in “Waiting for Guffman”…still no news on the upcoming “Woofstock” festival. A huge hit in Toronto and elsewhere, September 18th will mark it’s first foray onto the west coast. Their website indicates details coming soon, yet, nothing has been posted. Rumours are starting to circulate that perhaps they won’t come to Vancouver. I sincerely hope this is a rumour…I’ve been putting together the contents for my booth and I’ll be so disappointed if I don’t get a chance to display my wares. I’m dashing off an inquiry to Woofstock, so stay tuned…

The Natural Dog

joanna — Tue, 24 May 2005 00:07:32 +0000

How to Speak Dog

joanna — Tue, 24 May 2005 00:06:22 +0000

Scary, but fun

joanna — Sun, 20 Mar 2005 22:11:03 +0000

I have made a grave error. I bought a new toy for Hamish, it’s a round, red squeaky ball, but it has feet. I foolishly believed he would love this toy, since his friend at the park has one that he really liked playing with. Well, it was not so. He was simultaneously interested, terrified and obsessed. I threw the ball; he madly chased after it, but wouldn’t get too close. He stood a few feet away and barked at it. When that didn’t work, he started to growl. Frustrated with the lack of response, he circled around, and tried barking at it from the opposite side. He couldn’t understand why the “creature” was just sitting there passively, despite his efforts to coax it into play. So I got up, and threw it again, only for him to repeat his barking. I’d had just about enough, so I took the toy and put it away. His response was to lie down and whine constantly in front of the drawer I put the toy into. So I got it out, and we started the cycle all over again. A little while later I just couldn’t take it anymore, so I hid it from him. He must have a great sniffer - because he found it every time. Then he’d lie down where it was hidden and cry. I finally had to take it, show it to him, and make him watch while I opened the front door and put it outside. He finally stopped carrying on. Good-bye $7, it was nice knowing you!

Smell the Glove

joanna — Fri, 03 Dec 2004 03:24:47 +0000

Well, it’s confirmed… my dog is a genius!

Earlier today I took Hamish to the park for our usual adventure. Against my better judgement I decided to take my brand new leather gloves (since my fleece gloves were lost in another Hamish misadventure). While we were playing ball I realized that my beautiful new gloves were getting covered with slobber. Thinking I’d rather be safe than sorry I took my gloves off and put them in my coat pocket. This thought came back to haunt me mere minutes later.

As we were walking back home, it occurred to me that my gloves would be safer in my inside pocket. I reached into my outer pocket to find… ONE GLOVE! I knew the chances of finding my glove in the park were slim to none — not only is it a huge park, but it is very dark. I decided to try something I had seen numerous times on television and in the movies. Once we arrived back in the park I gave Hamish my remaining glove with the command “sniff it”. Then I urged him to “find it”. I had to remind him a few times what we were looking for since he got distracted by delicious scents of chicken bones and dog poop. I was just about to give up and head home when Hamish dashed over to a patch of the field. I looked around but didn’t see my glove. As I turned to leave, I heard a furious, flapping frenzy and looked over - Hamish had my glove in his mouth and was madly shaking it! Needless to say, I was completely elated to discover that my dog is indeed a genius. Today a missing glove, tomorrow a child in a well. Well done, Hamish!